Telling whoppers

Politicians have always lied; they need to balance so many interests that they can’t help it. But one thing worries me about the current state of British politics: the sheer scale of the lies.

The Iraquagmire, of course, is the big one – first the ghost WMDs, then the denial the war was being lost, now the incredible claim that it’s reducing terrorism (with the first homegrown suicide bombers appearing twice this month.) That’s a big lie.

But there are others. What about Brown’s missed target of keeping the country’s budget within his ‘golden rules’ – conveniently buried under other bad news? HE MISSED IT THIS WEEK! Yet unbelievably, Brown redefined the criteria of ‘economic cycle’ 24 hours before his announcement – moving the goalposts by 2 years. The £13bn this put back on the spreadsheet let him claim he was keeping to the rule. NO YOU’RE NOT, GORDON!

And it’s not a New Labour disease, either. The Conservative Party is still congratulating itself on a reasonable election back in May, gaining sixty seats or so. But Labour’s remaining majority – 66 seats – is still just as big as Margaret Thatcher’s after her landslide victory, which happened when the public sector was on a three-day week, currency controls were in place, and garbage was piled high in the streets. Conservatives are FAILING TO FACE REALITY.

It’s out in the wider world, too. EU leaders are congratulating themselves on agreeing $50bn of aid to Africa, while subsidising Europe’s farmers by many more billions a year – not only failing to balance the aid, but choking off the one economic activity Africa does well: grow cheap food. Letting Africa export could solve its troubles inside a decade, and add less than one percentage point (at absolute max) to Europe’s unemployment figures. Yet this dish ISN’T EVEN ON THE MENU.

And across the Atlantic, the whoppers are even bigger and better. A President gets elected by voter fraud for the second time; only a few brave journalists investigate. An American correspondent recently ‘wondered’ if the war on terror was doing any good. Good? With Iraq providing legitimacy and a training ground for suicide bombers, IT’S ACTIVELY MAKING IT WORSE!

Perhaps, though, the ultimate blame lies at home. In my spruce new London townhouse, with a busy business to run, I delude myself into thinking I’m affluent. Yet with a vast mortgage and enough credit cards to play poker with, I’m arguably POORER THAN ANY AFRICAN!!!!